Full Disclosure – I am finding there is ever increasing truth in the phenomenon of “wedding brain”. A professor of mine warned our entire nursing class about entering into any kind of relationship while in the program. It was good advice. I’m a focused student, but this semester has been much harder, as class difficulty, GPA expectations and amount of time needed to think about my future have all increased dramatically. Right at this moment, I am drafting this blog post while I avoid my 15 page paper about abdominal surgery adhesion and bowel obstruction risk. You would too, right?
And now, for the topic at hand. Childhood friends, college roommates, current classmates, family members and coworkers have asked some great questions during the course of my relationship with OaG. After getting past the initial ones like “When is the big day?”, “Where are you getting married?”, “You’re moving to…. KANSAS?!?!?” the most frequent question has been, “How did you know he was ‘the one’?”.
I think that’s a great question. And, it’s something that has been good for me to process. There are two separate sides to the answer. One is that of the spiritual confirmation (matters of the heart). The other, is that of the qualities of him and of our relationship (matters of the mind).
Falling in love with OaG wasn’t a singular event. He was the first to say the words, and it took me a little time to catch up. But, I can tell you the exact moment my heart softened toward him.
It wasn’t at our initial communication via eHarmony (I didn’t tell you that’s how we met, did I?). It wasn’t our first phone conversation. It wasn’t the first day we spent together walking the grounds of Appomattox Courthouse National Park. Nor was it when he called for a second date afterward. In fact, during all of those times, I viewed him simply as a chance to keep my dating skills from getting too rusty. Sure, I was happy to get out of the house, and I was glad to do a little civic duty by entertaining a visiting Army officer to our state. But, I wasn’t interested in anything more. He was from out-of-state, had been divorced and had full custody of his children – all complications I was really not looking to add to the peaceful and studious life I had recreated for myself following my father’s passing.